It can be difficult to find the words to show your support to a grieving friend or family member. There are several ways to send your condolences to a loved one who has experienced a loss:

  • In person at the service or visitation or during a visit after the loss 
  • Over a phone call
  • Direct private message 
  • Letter or card 
  • Brief note accompanying flowers 

A sympathy card provides the space to recognize the loss, honor and remember the deceased individual, and acknowledge your friend or family member’s grief. Besides bringing comfort, a simple note is a personal way that you can show loved ones your support at a time that matters most. 

The most important thing to consider when formulating your condolence is to be genuine, sensitive and sincere. Be aware that everyone's journey through grief is unique, and avoid sentiments that it was "for the best" or that "everything happens for a reason". Consider sharing a favorite memory of the deceased, admirable qualities, or ways in which he or she impacted your life. 

Here are some helpful examples of how you may wish to begin your message:

  1. Our deepest sympathies for your loss. We’re here whenever you need anything.
  2. We are saddened to hear about your loss. Remembering all the fun memories and wonderful times we spent together as friends fills me with joy.
  3. Wishing you courage, strength and love to help you through this loss. Grandma Susan will stay ageless in the memories of those who loved her.
  4. Please accept my deepest condolences. I am thinking of you and your family during this difficult time. 
  5. I am very sorry for your loss. He/She was a wonderful person, and they will be missed.

Suggestions for ending your message: 

  1. You are in my thoughts
  2. With warm thoughts and care
  3. My sincere condolences 
  4. I wish you comfort and peace
  5. I love you, and I’m here

Short messages, often helpful to write on a note accompanying flowers:

  1. We’re deeply sorry for your loss
  2. Thinking of you and grandma Susan
  3. Sending you love
  4. I’m here whenever you need me
  5. I’m thinking of you

Religious card messages:

  1. You are in our prayers
  2. With blessings and prayers
  3. May God comfort you and your family
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